Premarital Habbits

Hello Everyone! This week in Family Relations we talked a lot about the transitions one goes through during the first year of marriage. One thing that really stuck out to me was that the habits developed during engagement are the habits that are carried into marriage. This means when your fiance doesn't help with the dishes that person more than likely won't do the dishes when you're married. Communication is so, so key! Communication is one of those habits that is developed in a relationship you can be so happy. Nothing is ever perfect, but things will be much better. If something is bothering you the best way to fix it is to address it. I know that is a really hard concept to put into practice, but every time I decide to address my problems and frustrations I can the resolve my issues a lot faster and with less unnecessary drama.

I hope everyone has a great week! 

With love: Sydney

Dating

Hello Everyone! This week we talked about relationships and dating and falling in love and stuff which for me is a really interesting topic. Something that stuck out to me this week was that going on dates needs to be a ginormous priority! Not hanging out or any of that, but actually going on dates. We learned that a lot of people will go on a few dates until they get a girlfriend or boyfriend and then once they are officially "dating" they stop going on dates. That doesn't make any sense to me. The purpose of going on dates is to see how a person acts in different situations. It means doing things that you might not necessarily like doing but your significant other likes that activity. Dating keeps things safe and interesting. Dating should be a priority in courtship, engagement, and marriage.

You might ask "What's the point of dating while you're married?" Well I've learned from my parents, who have made dating a priority, that it lets you and your spouse be alone for a few hours without the kids. You can focus on each other and not have to worry about what's going on at home. It's really relaxing. The dates you do don't have to be very elaborate but they should be thought about and meaningful. By going on dates regularly you and your spouse can grow closer together and you'll be happier.

I hope you all have a great week! Thanks for reading!

With love: Sydney

Gender Roles

Hello Everyone! I really enjoyed Family 160 this week. On Thursday we started class by talking about the different roles of men and women. We said that men are typically more protecting, competitive, mechanically minded, aggressive, and task oriented. We said that women are typically more nurturing, sensitive, emotionally expressive, cooperative, and relationship oriented. We then talked about the stages of same sex attraction. We talked about a boy or girl who feels rejected by their peers of the same gender when they are younger feel more comfortable around members of the opposite gender. They then grow in to their teenage years and just like every child that age they are seeking for the approval of those they aren't familiar with. For the boys who hang out with girls, they just want to interact and be accepted by the other guys. At this point there is really no sexual attraction to those of the same sex, they just want to learn more. After they still can't find approval from those of the same gender they then tend to have sexual thoughts towards those of the same gender.

Those who have same gender attraction are constantly trying to fill their buckets but as Dallin H. Oaks states "You can never get enough of what you don't need, because what you don't need won't satisfy." There are those who realize this and seek out help and support to change. There have been people who have changed their homosexual behaviors and ended up living a very rich and fulfilling heterosexual life styles.

At the end of class of Thursday the women, mainly the married women, of our class were asked if they would like it if their husbands were more nurturing, sensitive, emotionally expressive, cooperative, and relationship oriented. They all said yes! They would love it if their husbands could possess some of these qualities. Brother Williams then stated, "How sad is it that society takes these men our of your dating pool.

That really hit me. I need to be less judgmental and help others to be less judgmental as well. I loved learning about men and women this week. It was very eye opening.

I hope everyone has a great week!

With love: Sydney

Immigration

Hello Everyone! I really enjoyed class last week. On Thursday we did a role play about the difficulty of immigration. We not only talked about how difficult the transition is on individuals, but we also talked about the way the family changes. The example we used in class was of a typical family in Mexico. I never realized how difficult it is for a family to move from Mexico to the United States. There are so many obstacles to overcome just for the just the father to cross the boarder. Then he has to find a job and try to save money so that eventually his family can come over. The separation of the father from the family tends to be about three years. In these three years the family dynamics change. The mother now has to play the role of mother and father. The children have to step in and start supporting the family now as well. Extended family also steps in from time to time. The children don't have a father figure to look up to any more so that can cause a lot of problems. After all of this sometimes the family in Mexico doesn't even want to go to America anymore and the father ends up going back. If the family does make it to America they now have to figure out how to survive in their new home. They have most likely dropped in class and they don't live as comfortable as they used to. There is often an awkwardness with the father as well. The family knows he is important, but they have lived without him for so long that there tends to be conflicts.

I found this to be very interesting. It's amazing how the family changes when life happens. We are able to fill hole that are gone. Such as a father heading to America to start a new life for his family. Everyone pitches in to make the situation better. It is also really sad how the family can start to fall apart after filling that hole. Because there isn't a father in the home for about three years the children have a hard time remembering him and what the family was like when there was a mom and a dad. It just shows me again how important it is to have a traditional family with a mother and a father.

I really commend those parents who are willing to make the sacrifice to come to America. It definitely wouldn't be easy and I know if I was in there shoes I couldn't do it.

I hope something I've said has impacted someone. Have a great week!

With love: Sydney

Family Dynamics

Hello Everyone! This week in Family Relations we focused on understanding family dynamics. I've always loved watching people interact with their families. I've also always found it interesting how every single family is different. Something that is not okay in my house is totally acceptable in others and visa versa. For example, in my family we don't watch PG-13 movies, but that is totally okay in other households. My parents just made the choice that they wouldn't watch those movies and then they let us decide for ourselves. I didn't realize until this week that when two families merge by marriage then these family rules and dynamics also merge and sometimes clash. I've never thought about that until this week's class.

I'm really excited for the day that I get to merge my family with my future eternal companion's family! I'm making myself a promise that whatever the struggle be when it comes to different rules I'm not going to get mad. We are going to talk about things.

I hope everyone has a great week. Thanks for being great people!

With love: Sydney